Throughout my adulthood, an unwavering source of family connection for me has been my relationship to Wayne. Despite our divorce we have maintained a close connection. I have invited Wayne to participate in this blog because he is part of our family. He's also one of the most honorable men I know. Wayne has been a wonderful father to Katie, I can't imagine her having a better dad. She has inherited from him her delightful (and quirky) sense of humor. She shares his love of story telling and his prodigious memory for detail. During Katie's youth, Wayne was constant in his support of her, both financially and in his presence in her life. He always did what he said he was going to do, he was someone we could both count on. When Frank became a part of Wayne's life our family expanded. There were challenges for Katie in having a gay dad, but she has become a more expansive person because of them. She learned to speak her mind. But that is Katie's history and is her story to tell.
My desire here is to simply acknowledge and honor Wayne: for his loyalty, his constancy, and for his huge heart. What some of you may not know is that a few years ago Wayne and Frank took in Frank's Aunt Julia. She was in her 90's, her health and memory were failing, and she had very few financial resources. Wayne and Frank's response to Julia's need was to sell their house in Escondido and move into a larger home in Murietta that had enough space for Julia. For several years, these loving men arranged their lives to care for her. Wayne tells many heart-warming stories about this woman he came to know so well; tears fill his eyes as he describes her gradual loss of acuity. Their dedication to her, their sacrifices for her still take my breath away.
On September 20th of this year, after living together for 21 years, Wayne and Frank were married. I applaud the state of California for making that step possible. I look forward to the day when we are able to embrace the diversity of life styles and choices that exist in this country and that are exemplified in part in these two men.
Part of who I am, dear family, has been shaped by my knowing and loving Wayne Blizzard and I wouldn't change any of it one iota.
3 comments:
Congratulations, Wayne and Frank! And thank you, Mary, for sharing your reflections about family. As a member of a blended family, it helps me to remember that kids are blessed by all the adults in their lives, not just the ones they are genetically related to.
Thanks, Mary, for inviting Wayne into our family dialogue. Wayne, I hope you'll jump right in! I loved watching the video of your ceremony on Katie's Facebook page and hearing her pride in you. I agree with Mary...your presence in our family enriches us all. It did when Suzanne, Jonathan & Peter were small and you were an integral part of our/their lives. And it continues to as you live you life with integrity, faithfulness and humor!!
Barbara
Thank you, Mary. I often tell people that I'm lucky to have you as my ex-wife (which is supposed to be funny)! "But seriously, folks," you've been a constant and supportive force in my life and a devoted mom to KT. I'm so happy too that you and my parents have grown even closer over the years - they really treasure you, and for good reason. Suzanne and Barbara, thank you for your kind words. I promise to post a blog entry now and then!
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